If you are kind and polite, the world will be right

Roy Sexton
Kerr, Russell &?Weber

My legal marketing buddy Nancy Myrland and I both love movies. Notably, we particularly love movies where kindness is prevalent and inclusive behaviors are modeled.

At least that’s how I rationalize the fact that two grown legal marketers both adore the Paddington films. That little bear from deepest, darkest Peru has a mantra: “If we are kind and polite, the world will be right.”
Lovely, isn’t it?

This concept couldn’t be more important in our tumultuous times. “Disruption” is the word of the day, and, man, are we ever disrupted.

Of course, we see this culturally and politically, but we also see it in our legal industry. Technology brings amazing advances, efficiencies, and “super powers” we never knew we could possess. Would I have imagined 20 years ago, I would have a device in my pocket and social networks therein that would allow me to access friends and experts around the globe in an instant? Nope.

However, this technology also brings great change. As the music industry, the print media industry, the photography industry, and many others have all witnessed, technology can cause customer migration, profit erosion, infrastructural change, and wholesale business model reinvention.

We in the legal space have known for years that this is coming for us — at what speed and in what fashion is still being determined. We are living in our own history right now, and we won’t see the forest for the trees for quite a while. However, we as marketing and communications and strategy and business development professionals must be at the forefront of these conversations, must embrace the new ideas, must socialize them within our organizations, and must be active participants in the writing of that history.

Fine, Roy. So where does Paddington come in?

Empathy and understanding and listening are crucial business skills that are too often dismissed as “soft.” Yet, having finely calibrated emotional antennae helps us predict the future and navigate the present.
Culture eats strategy for lunch. A cliché but an apt one. Without accurately assessing the anxiety-ridden waters in which we swim and finding ways to engage and allay our partners’ emotional pain points, we will never achieve the organizational focus required to create lasting, meaningful change.

The next time you are in a heated conversation with partners over an issue close to your heart, stay calm, stay empathetic, stay committed, and don’t meet their energy at a heightened level. Underplay it, keep the facts on your side, and use empathy: why are they arguing your idea? why are they pushing back? Trust me, it’s not to torture you. Don’t make it about you.

Lawyers learn through argumentation. That’s how they burnish ideas. Also, the money you spend, at the end of the day, comes out of their pockets. Understand that business model and appreciate it. Further, change isn’t easy for any of us. Who has bought an exercise book somehow thinking it will magically transfer abs to them without actually following the prescribed routines? This guy for one.

Knowing that none of us want to change but that we must change, take the time to understand your partners’ histories, training, experiences and how all of that will impact their willingness to adopt the very ideas they must adopt to survive.

And first and foremost, be kind and polite (even if others aren’t … and especially if others aren’t). The world will be right.

Postscript …

This is why I go to LMA’s annual conference: my energy and emotional “work reservoir” are replenished being around like-minded professionals. I learn new skills and trends and issues facing us all, not just in the sessions but in the hallway chatter and the cocktail parties and the late night coffee runs.

In fact, do not flee the social interaction or run off to take a conference call in your downtime. Talk to people, learn from them, include them.

LMA can feel like the biggest clique in the world. It ain’t.

It’s just that we don’t get to see each other that often, and, for new people, it can seem like we don’t want you to play our reindeer games. Nothing could be further from the truth. I was one of those new people (what feels like yesterday), but I tweeted and I Facebook’d and I got out of my own head and I approached people.

And we old guard, in turn, need to be mindful and empathetic about what it was like to be “new.” Be kind. Be polite. Be supportive. Be inclusive. Those skills will serve you well at LMA, at your firms, and in life.

So says Paddington Bear.

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Roy Sexton is responsible for leading Kerr, Russell, and Weber, PLC’s marketing, business development, communications, and strategic planning efforts.