Tracy K. Lorenz ...

prev
next

Typing Out Loud While Having to be Somewhere Else

Trees are just the super slo-mo explosion of a seed.

I wonder what it sounds like when a Chinese person speaks French?

Mickey Mouse ears are round from every angle. Thus they are actually balls.

Dead chickens probably kill a thousand people a year, live chickens probably don’t kill any.

Delivered and delivered sound the same but they feel way different.

It would really be bad to have a claustrophobic brain.

How many Fitbits have recorded the exact moment their owner’s heart stopped beating?

Genies could have been a thing until someone wished them away.

Probably one billionth of the sun’s light actually hits the earth, the rest is just wasted out in space.

Since Pi is infinite, odds are pretty good your phone number is in there somewhere.

Armadillos are just tactical assault possums.

I wonder how many antivaxers have Mcafee on their computer?

Self driving cars will be cool but eventually someone is going to die en route and then your uncle or your pizza guy is going to show up dead.

There’s no such thing as “unlimited minutes per month” because every month has a finite amount of minutes.

Your body is a hair printer that loses ink as you age until it’s just printing white.

When people in movies fight monsters the monsters are always slow and clumsy and easily
evaded.  That must be how we look to flies.

I don’t think I ever had a Phys Ed teacher who was in good shape.

When you look at how they’re built, there’s a good chance Tyrannosaurus Rex jumped around like kangaroos.

If you’re blind and dyslexic does it mess you up when you read braille?

 If humans never developed eyes or ears we’d never know how things looked or sounded, we wouldn’t even know those things were possibilities because we never evolutionized the proper tools. So right now we could be surrounded by dead people and not know it because we never developed the sense that would allow us to experience them.

I’m not sure if I’m a night owl or if I was just meant to live in a different time zone.

Go Green!

Printed by permission of the author. Email him at Lorenzatlarge@aol.com.
Get Tracy’s latest book at BarnesandNoble.com or Amazon.com, or  download it from www.fastpencil.com.
Only $3.99, cheap.

Comments

  1. No comments
Sign in to post a comment »