By Traci Rhoades
It’s that time of year. I’m in the early days of reading through the Bible chronologically, and I’m reading Job this week. While Job has become the biblical poster child for suffering, I’d like to offer him up as a teacher of lament as well.
An online Bible dictionary defines lament: “To mourn; to grieve; to weep; or wail; to express sorrow.”
Upon receiving news his children had died, and suffering from physical illness himself, Job expressed lament in four ways:
1. He sat among the ashes (Job 2:8)
One of the best ways to acknowledge our grief is to sit with it. Society offers any number of ways to run from or ignore suffering, sorrow, or disappointment. Instead, consider what God might have for us if we sit in these tender moments. What if we gave others permission to sit as long as they needed to with their own grief?
There’s a reason cultures have periods of structured grieving time. Consider the week-long mourning period of sitting shiva still practiced in Judaism today.
2. He realized the presence of friends was a gift (Job 2:11-13)
When we’re introduced to Job’s friends; Eliphaz, Bildad and Zophar (Elihu is later, in chapter 32). At first, they’re a welcome relief, offering him condolences and comfort. They join him in weeping, tearing their cloaks, and tossing dust in the air over their heads. For seven days and seven nights they sit beside Job on the ground and don’t speak. These are all cultural norms for the time; tangible ways communities grieved together.
And if they had stopped there, they would have been very good friends indeed. We know, though, they don’t stop there. They offered advice, then spewed accusations. Today, when silence is uncomfortable, we do something similar, sharing what we consider “words of wisdom.” More than our words, what is most needed is our quiet presence.
3. He asked God for a response (Job 7:17-21, 31:2-12)
In chapter 7, Job calls on the “watcher of the human heart,” asking why he’s become a target. Job wants to hear a word from God, whom he has trusted. We all do, when we don’t understand what has happened. As we personally, or the entire world, suffer another disaster, man-made or one of natural causes, and God seems silent.
God answers, though maybe it’s not always the anticipated reply. Just ask Job. “Then the Lord answered Job out of the tempest” (Job 38:1). From the eye of a storm, he reminds Job and his friends, and all those who have encountered the ancient book of Job since; he is God, his ways are bigger and his vantage point greater. See, when we talk to God, and wait for his response, we may not get answers, but we could encounter God. That’s always life-changing.
4. He got a new start (Job 42:10-17)
If I authored Job’s story, it would end differently. Perhaps readers could encounter the first resurrections, with Job’s children coming back to life. We could read about the earliest development of a medicine that cures boils overnight. To my mind, these are preferred alternatives to the actual ending.
In the end, we read Job had seven more sons and daughters, God blessed him with great material possessions, and he lived a long life. But he still lost everything before that, including his original ten children, and that’s not fair.
Therein lies part of our need for lament, because life is not fair. Lament won’t make things fair, but in time it makes room in our hearts for something new. We see God bring beauty from ashes. Lament can help us better see the role suffering may play in the bigger picture. As believers, we realize taking the time to mourn properly deepens our faith in God, and guides us into a greater love for one another.
Job’s life has a lot to teach us about lament. The Church can respond with a number of practices to help us grieve and heal in community. We can pray the psalms, in our prayer books or directly from the Bible. Churches can offer their sanctuaries as quiet spaces to pray. Clergy can walk us through the intentional lamenting seasons built into the church calendar; Advent, Lent and particular days of Holy Week. In our church services, we can regularly offer prayers of confession, altar calls and guided silence during worship.
Job shows us how to suffer and lament: by sitting with sorrow, receiving the gift of quiet companionship, honestly calling out to God for a response, and eventually making space for new life after loss. With the psalmist, we can be assured: “The Lord has heard my cry for mercy; the Lord accepts my prayer” (Psalm 6:9).
—————
Traci Rhoades is a faith writer who advocates for an integrated life rooted in Christ. Her family of three loves living near the beach towns of Lake Michigan.
It’s that time of year. I’m in the early days of reading through the Bible chronologically, and I’m reading Job this week. While Job has become the biblical poster child for suffering, I’d like to offer him up as a teacher of lament as well.
An online Bible dictionary defines lament: “To mourn; to grieve; to weep; or wail; to express sorrow.”
Upon receiving news his children had died, and suffering from physical illness himself, Job expressed lament in four ways:
1. He sat among the ashes (Job 2:8)
One of the best ways to acknowledge our grief is to sit with it. Society offers any number of ways to run from or ignore suffering, sorrow, or disappointment. Instead, consider what God might have for us if we sit in these tender moments. What if we gave others permission to sit as long as they needed to with their own grief?
There’s a reason cultures have periods of structured grieving time. Consider the week-long mourning period of sitting shiva still practiced in Judaism today.
2. He realized the presence of friends was a gift (Job 2:11-13)
When we’re introduced to Job’s friends; Eliphaz, Bildad and Zophar (Elihu is later, in chapter 32). At first, they’re a welcome relief, offering him condolences and comfort. They join him in weeping, tearing their cloaks, and tossing dust in the air over their heads. For seven days and seven nights they sit beside Job on the ground and don’t speak. These are all cultural norms for the time; tangible ways communities grieved together.
And if they had stopped there, they would have been very good friends indeed. We know, though, they don’t stop there. They offered advice, then spewed accusations. Today, when silence is uncomfortable, we do something similar, sharing what we consider “words of wisdom.” More than our words, what is most needed is our quiet presence.
3. He asked God for a response (Job 7:17-21, 31:2-12)
In chapter 7, Job calls on the “watcher of the human heart,” asking why he’s become a target. Job wants to hear a word from God, whom he has trusted. We all do, when we don’t understand what has happened. As we personally, or the entire world, suffer another disaster, man-made or one of natural causes, and God seems silent.
God answers, though maybe it’s not always the anticipated reply. Just ask Job. “Then the Lord answered Job out of the tempest” (Job 38:1). From the eye of a storm, he reminds Job and his friends, and all those who have encountered the ancient book of Job since; he is God, his ways are bigger and his vantage point greater. See, when we talk to God, and wait for his response, we may not get answers, but we could encounter God. That’s always life-changing.
4. He got a new start (Job 42:10-17)
If I authored Job’s story, it would end differently. Perhaps readers could encounter the first resurrections, with Job’s children coming back to life. We could read about the earliest development of a medicine that cures boils overnight. To my mind, these are preferred alternatives to the actual ending.
In the end, we read Job had seven more sons and daughters, God blessed him with great material possessions, and he lived a long life. But he still lost everything before that, including his original ten children, and that’s not fair.
Therein lies part of our need for lament, because life is not fair. Lament won’t make things fair, but in time it makes room in our hearts for something new. We see God bring beauty from ashes. Lament can help us better see the role suffering may play in the bigger picture. As believers, we realize taking the time to mourn properly deepens our faith in God, and guides us into a greater love for one another.
Job’s life has a lot to teach us about lament. The Church can respond with a number of practices to help us grieve and heal in community. We can pray the psalms, in our prayer books or directly from the Bible. Churches can offer their sanctuaries as quiet spaces to pray. Clergy can walk us through the intentional lamenting seasons built into the church calendar; Advent, Lent and particular days of Holy Week. In our church services, we can regularly offer prayers of confession, altar calls and guided silence during worship.
Job shows us how to suffer and lament: by sitting with sorrow, receiving the gift of quiet companionship, honestly calling out to God for a response, and eventually making space for new life after loss. With the psalmist, we can be assured: “The Lord has heard my cry for mercy; the Lord accepts my prayer” (Psalm 6:9).
—————
Traci Rhoades is a faith writer who advocates for an integrated life rooted in Christ. Her family of three loves living near the beach towns of Lake Michigan.
